<h3>A Woman Without A Man Is Like A Fish Without A Bicycle (Part Deux)</h3>

It's funny how the term "feminist" has been maligned and slaughtered to such an extent that women fear being labelled as a feminist instead of being proud to be one. This is really unfortunate. On the other hand. some have even taken the term "feminist" to the other end of the spectrum and use it to justify their hedonistic lifestyle, often filled with one-night stands and leaving a trail of broken hearts. They reason that since they are "fighting" for equality between the sexes, they can treat men the same way some men treat women.

By most accounts, I identify myself as a feminist. No, not the bra-burning, man-hating lesbian type but a feminist all the same. One might question how I dare call myself a feminist when firstly I am a) married b) openly professes to being charmed by flowers and diamonds and extravagant dinners by my husband c) cooks and cleans up after him d)not actively participating in any earth-shaking convention or protests. Heck I'm not even an AWARE member. (I'm filing in the application form as you read this, maybe you should too!) But still, I call myself a feminist all the same.


I believe in equality between the genders. I am against patriachy simply because I believe women have a great deal to contribute to the society and by virtue of this alone, their needs, strengths and views must be taken into consideration in any factor be it job application, the passing of laws, governmental restrictions or benefits etc etc, in fact in anything and everything. While some people (feminists included) take this to mean that in order to practise equality, women can no longer request, demand or seek privileges and/or consideration, I beg to differ.

My Muslim background has taught me that equality does not equate to identical. This concept may be hard to grasp, especially with the widespread perception that Islam supresses women. But if you would take a minute to consider this concept, I assure you will see the logic of it.
"The important point to be kept in mind about the Islamic concept of equality is that despite considering a man and a woman equal, Islam places them in different spheres of social set-up, according to their biological and natural capabilities, so that they work in their separate spheres and benefit the society accordingly. Contrary to this notion when the western concept of equality once admits that man and woman are born equal then it refuses to accept any difference between the two on the basis of their natural and biological aptitudes and capabilities. It tends to use both of them in the same capacity. This results in the fact that when a woman or a man tries to utilise her/his energies and natural inclinations in areas not meant for each of them; then not only the society suffers but both man and woman have negative effect on their personalities because of this misuse.
This is a fact and is neither degrading to man nor to woman. We know that a woman can conceive but a man cannot. It is neither shameful for a woman to conceive nor for a man not to do so. The very existence of human race depends on the fact that each one of them should proceed with what God has made them capable of. The duties assigned, to man and woman, by nature have their own importance individually. One cannot argue that to take care of a household is not important compared to running an office, or to raise children is degrading compared to trade or learning war techniques. All the roles played by men and women for the survival of collective and social system are equally important.
" - Amin Ahsan Islahi(Translated by Amar Ellahi Lone) Read more here

The problem arises not because of the restrictions in Islam but because of the perception (propogated by the patriarch society, no doubt) that a woman's job of handling a household and bringing up and educating children is menial compared to a man sitting in a glass-walled office, wearing a three-piece suit barking orders to his staff. It is this long entrenched conjecture that is making women feel they too need to hold a high-flying job outside their home in order to validate themselves, thereby relegating their house-bound duties and child-rearing to paid help or juggle a superwoman itinerary and stretching themselves dry.

It is sad to see in this day and age of modern technology that we women still live our life according to the rules and regulations set up by men. We strife to meet their standards, whether in terms of physical appearances or achievements and constantly look to them for approval and validation. How many women do you know immediately put on their "feminine" voice and mannerism the moment a guy enters the room? How many women you know try to assert their "feminine-ness" when in front of a male specimen, cross their legs, pout their lips and flutter their eyeleashes ??

So while feminism in the first wave concentrated on gaining the right of women's suffrage, the second wave on inclusion of women in traditionally male-dominated areas and the third wave seeking to challenge and expand common definitions of gender and sexuality (ie including lesbianism) perhaps the fourth wave shall be to let women exist on their own right, for their own purpose, to make choices totally on their own accord and be judged solely by their own standards.

And in order to make it happen, we will have to make our own stand.